ideas of me

Some of you know what is going on others have no clue this is to attempt to fill you in so much shit has happened. Last week in Feb my ear was hurting I assumed it was a bug bite or even a pimple even though haven't had one in the ear since I was like 15. I went to work like normal Wed 2-28 my ear had swollen. I didn't know I know the bitch hurt. My buddy John said something so after work went to hang with him and chrissy like always. My god its worse Hassan you need a Dr appt. I did schedule it that day for the following. I got there I get ear drops and 3 pills. The reason not enough blood flow going to my ear. But why is my face all fucked up and paralyzed. Oh well he said gets worse go to the ER. I went and got the stuff $80. Well here comes friday along its looks better int he morning I start to drive to work to talk to my manager since I am a sup and she isn't there so I send a detailed email. Its even worse now no reason why again. Lymph Nodes all swollen ear closing up can't hear constant migraines and take tylenol for the pain WTF you wacko. Go to the ER that night at 7pm. Well I am watching TV waiting for registration to start she calls my name but I can't hear so mom taps me I go. She says shocked you heard me over the tv I was like huh read the chart I can't hear you at all she laughed and apologized. Well the DR on staff was busy rooms filled and the lobby is packed he came out and said I don't like this if its what I think it is you need to get a room and need an IV stat. So I get an IV and a super duper blood test. Testing for everything and anything even another STD test even though I had one like 3 months ago. All clean no idea they know its an infection that is it. I am in pain 4 hours there they ask are you on pain killers I said no but I need to be so they give it to me. I am told in my CAT scan my head is ok the infection is not leaking into my brain. But my ear is bad. So I get more fucking pills 3 again another $90. I go to the GP sat he gives me even more stuff steroids anti inflamatory and antibiotic. I also got stuff Nicotrol Inhaler to help my quit smoking again.

I do all this and today Monday I went to the ENT (Ear nose and throat doctor) He did a hearing test didn't loose any hearing. However I find out the paralized lips face eye and tongue may be permanent. On top of that I find out he may have to drain the infection by cutting into my ear or it may heal and be deformed. I can't smile blow rasberries whistle shit I can't even eat a burger or sleep well cause my left eye won't close all the way. My left side of the skull constant migrains unless on pain meds for 7 days straight roughly. So what I have finally came into the fucking picture FINALLY. RAMSY HUNT SYNDROME. http://www.ramsayhunt.org/ incase you wanna read about it. I have an MRI coming up to see if the face issue will be a permanent issue. But I saw him. I got eye drops for my left eye since it won't close cause he doesn't want my eyes to suffer then I got fucking Valtrex (treats herpes) because my ear has some fluid like stuff and it is meant to help. No herpes I am clean so shut it. Then I got percasets again for the pain. I will return to work on the 12th and I miss it I would rather have the worst week of my life then deal with this you know. But I am here I am alive and I know the reason why is Sandy and my doggie Winnie is watching over me. I truely am scared I don't know what to expect what to do or anything. Well its cigarette time and maybe a cartoon to help cheer me up but here is the update.

So what can I say. My vacation was OK first couple days and the last couple days was horrible as well. I hung out with some really really close new friends and hung out withs ome old ones as well. I just found out my god mother has anywhere from 4 weeks to 4 months to live. What the hell is wrong with people I mean all this technology and they give us that big of a time frime. Mother fuckers that isn't right.Well this is my bitching pissed off rant.

Well what can I say. I went to see my potential new interest as in gf. And we cuddled up watched a movie and magical things happened and were said. I asked her the awwwwing question be my gf. She answered yes thank goodness. I am happy. We are going out wednesday to dinner wish I could see her beautiful smile and eyes sooner. But must wait right that is the right thing. We are having a family talk on Wednesday. I hope she knows I am there for her no matter what her mood swing it. I am sure I will make her laugh even if I have to make an ass of myself.

So I met an amazing woman on Wednesday night. We did some talking online she was stressed having a bad day and was curious if I would come over to hang out and it might help with the stress. You know me no problem I love making new friends. So went over fairly easy to get to. We did some talking and hanging out of course had a beer because of the crazy night at work. But from this one visit an amazing thing happened. This like bolt of lightning that said this woman is amazing I need to hang around because I see her as a potential. I unfortunately left around 430am. Went home and crashed hard.

Got up the next morning that is right yesterday going to work not knowing what I was going to do when I got off work. Well Deb emailed and we talked on the phone she said she was having her anual Yule party which previously I wasn't going to because we hadn't met. For her to invite means we had a blast and clicked so well. I even had the spastic cat rub up to me so good sign lol. I get there and we chit chat a bit I am already a little tore up from te ride.At about 130-2am Deb sits next to me and we proceed to just cuddle. She was special because she got a nice massage (easier if she was laying down) and then I just sat there carressing her neck and ears her hair just amazing time. Touch sense is an amazing thing. She leaned back and I felt the urge and kissed her! She kissed back amazing tiggling butterfly type feeling hit which means she is perfect and that I need to stick around. So I cuddled and held her not wanting to let go until about 6am. Kissing her soft passionate lips and her neck it was asking for it :P. She didn't want me to leave I didn't want to go but had to I could of held her all night and just crashed so that is a super good sign. I left giving and getting another amazing kiss from her. Talked today and we made plans to go out. I unfortunately have ot wait until Wednesday to see her but well worth it. Nice dinner amazing flowers that I will use later in the massaging / carressing the neck. Hope she likes. She is an amazing caring person which in this day in age is hard to find. I could honestly say yes if any question were to come up of something a little more serious just from the connection we have been having. As I type this I remember she will read this lol. I miss her voice her touch her lips her kindness already. I hope she misses me the same way.